if life is meaningless then you suddenly have the option to give it any meaning you want, abandon your old ways they clearly don’t suit you, if you have nothing to lose you have everything to gain, so go out there any try things you never would before, because what have you got to lose?
I’m not looking at any of your recommendations so I have no idea if you would like this but I really enjoy twoodfrd, he makes videos about repairing guitars and other string instruments, very relaxing, soothing voice, and lots of fascinating info about guitars