As the WOATest WOAT, I’ve got the other end on lock! We’re killing it, buddy!

User-Agent: bender

Disallow: /my_shiny_metal_ass

Ha!

Just in case it makes you feel any better: I’m a native English speaker who always aced the reading comprehension tests back in school, and I read it the exact same way. Lol! I’m glad I wasn’t the only one. :)

I’m not who you were talking to, but thank you for this comment. You’re so very kind and it’s beautiful. You’ve helped me and I appreciate you so much. You totally rock! 💖

Hiya! Welcome to Beehaw! We’re happy to have ya :) 🐝💕

Yikes! Thanks for sharing this, OP.

Things are…bad. I’m so tired of existing in this broken, useless body & brain 🙃

I’m right there with you with every word. It’s so hard to be kind to myself, lol. I feel for you. I hope the funk you’re in passes very soon and you’re able return to your healthier habits quickly and without too much trouble. I know how hard it is. Much love to you! 💖

Lol! That reminds me of how (when AOL was thing and I was probably way too young to be on it but would use it to talk to family) my mom had me type out and send “I bought a bunch of cars and RECTUM!” via email or AIM out of nowhere to random family members with no context, even though I had no idea why that was funny, but she thought it was hilarious. Which is pretty damn funny looking back!

I love this type of thing! There’s also:

“Guess why?”/“Chicken thigh!”

“Guess who?”/“Chicken poo!”

As a kid I also came up with “Guess when?”/“Chicken shin!” “Guess where?”/“Chicken hair!” and “Guess how?”/“Chicken COW!!” but those may not be quite as good, hahaha.

I hope they reply (and that I remember to come back and check again so I can see it,) I’m very interested, too!

Ooh, I looked it up and it sounds interesting. I look forward to figuring it out and experiencing it for myself, thanks! :)

One toke is over the line? Sweet Jesus!

Outlook.com, duh!

Not good, as usual. My poor sweet cat is suffering and I don’t have the money or resources or ability to do anything about it. I’m tired of being useless because of my disabilities and I’m tired of being so burned out and in pure survival mode all the time. I wish I had the energy/functioning/mental bandwidth to put some words down about what’s actually going on. If anyone wants to send some good vibes or thoughts or prayers or whatever in the direction of my sweet kitty Ziggy and I, I’d appreciate it. She deserves so much better.

You should get a really powerful slingshot and yeet them right into some petroleum executive’s face!

I just lost The Game?

Ooh, neat! I didn’t know there was a fediverse version of Tumblr. Thanks for sharing!!

That cute little mascot is just gosh darn precious!

Pretty damn bad. Everything feels so hopeless. Things just keep piling on and getting worse. Now I won’t have phone/Internet service to help me talk to friends and help distract myself from my disabilities/health issues/chronic pain/life issues etc which is extra sucky since I’m pretty much bedbound. So I won’t have a connection to the outside world anymore. And I still haven’t figured out how to help my poor kitty and I hate that she’s suffering and I’m too non-functioning and broke to do anything about it. I’m overwhelmed and I don’t know why I’m posting this and it probably makes no sense but I’m trying not to dump my issues on my poor friends. So I guess I’m screaming into the void, I dunno. I’m sorry. I hate myself lol