Howdy fellow Texan!

I dont have to be stabbed in the eye with a pen to know I wouldn’t enjoy it.

We have this ridiculous system at my work. Knives are prohibited, but get through all the time, tape measures and water bottles really piss it off though.

Might want to fix that typo there.

Are you saying the US doesn’t have a gang problem?

My ex wife.

UuuU

A lawn chair, case of beer and a varmint rifle will make a good start.

This may surprise you, but “white supremacists” 🙄 Aren’t all that fond of the jews, regardless of their skin tone.

Yet another reason, I’m glad I don’t live in Europe. I like y’alls privacy laws, but besides that your entire lives revolve on wrapping yourselves in bubble wrap praying the government will save you from whatever.

If you can’t walk down a sidewalk with cars going by at 30mph then there’s something wrong with you.

This is probably a stupid question, but how do you dry your ass afterwards?

If you like pineapple, I’m sure its great. If you don’t like pineapple, its gonna ruin the whole fucking dish. You cant just scrape it off. The flavor permeates. Like olives. shudder

He would have, if he didn’t have his rifle on him.

Or, if you’re not a moron, you can Firefox, and ublock that shit.

Well that’s mighty White of 'em! Are they gonna provide the tools, and not void the “warantee” if you look at their products funny?

I pee in the shower, harder to miss when drunk.

No lights at all, sit down to pee, go the fuck back to sleep.

Imagine being downvoted for thinking women should be able to protect themselves.

Lol, looks like they mixed the popemobile with a shoebox.