How to make spaghetti carbonara taste better:

Food evolutionary genetics have not yet developed to the point of being able to successfully grow a tongue on a portion of spaghetti carbonara. However, the Gordon Ramsay-Bolton at the Food Research Institute in Bologna has made some key breakthroughs in surgically attaching mature pig tongues onto the carbonara using surgical-graded pasta-based thread and using a butter salve rubbed directly onto the tongue which has resulted in better tasting carbonara. Based on initial trials on 1455 individual portions, results have shown that the tongue was rejected in 40% of cases, which can result in a bad-tasting spaghetti carbonara.

How to change a lightbulb:

You cannot change a lightbulb without first identifying its political and social beliefs. Try having a conversation with it first to gauge what they think on a number of important subjects - do spanners have eyes, what colour is thought, when is the best time of day to think about popcorn, etc. Then try and challenge their beliefs with logical counterpoints, ask them how they formulated this belief. If this doesn’t work, try offering them money - £20 is usually enough, or as much as you can afford. It is best to check on the lightbulb every few weeks to make sure they haven’t changed back.

Some societies believe that it is wrong to change a lightbulb, and you should let them live life uninhibited. To find out more information, you can pour battery acid into a bowl of flour and encourage friends to juggle.

…Is this a bad time to ask what was in the top secret boxes trump had at Mar A Lago?

The two question zionists need to be explicitly asked are:

1. Hypothetically, do they even believe it would ever be possible for Israel to commit genocide?
2. If so, what characteristics would it need to have in order to qualify as genocide?

If they answer no to the first one, they expose their complete bias and therefore unable to even argue their position effectively.

If they answer yes, then they have to explain why the genocidal traits of what Israel are doing are not genocide, which might hopefully make them more introspective.

Convince humans that you aren’t a stork with this one neat trick!

At his next rally, I imagine he’ll waddle onstage to Jesus, He Knows Me.

It seems there are some in the UK Government willing to game the Israel Gaza conflict to their electoral advantage. Not boots on ground, and thankfully its being called out by the opposition as wrong, but shows they are at least considering this in their deliberations for calling for a ceasefire. https://feddit.uk/post/9265224

If an embryo is a fully-fledged person then about 51% of people transition naturally before even being born, which is why men have nipples. Let’s see the right wing lobby tackle that dilemma in the US legislature. Do they want no rights to medical support for all men? What if they switch back to women?

I really hope so. I doubt troops would be deployed to Gaza too, but would not put it past them to consider deploying to Yemen to take out the Houthis.

But it is all political. Houthis are funded by SA and Iran. They are attacking because of Israel’s genocidal treatment of 2 million people in Gaza. I mean the Houthis are awful, as are Hamas, but there are lots of other awful groups doing awful stuff around the globe 24/7 that impact UK and US interests but don’t prompt severe military retaliation. Russia tried to shoot down a RAF jet last year - nothing happened, diplomacy won out. So why the sudden need to approve these strikes on a weekend? Attacks have been happening for months. Why didn’t they do an emergency recall to put the decision before Congress and HoC? They are playing with fire and they know it.

I’m just saying that a war declaration against a much less well-armed militia in Yemen for a prolonged military campaign and something they can claim to be in aid of a ‘good’ cause could be convenient to both Biden and Sunak for a boost in the polls. It also comes with fewer risks as they arent a nuclear power like Russia, Iran, SA, or Israel (yay proxy war). Sadly, I wouldn’t put it past either leader to have considered this.

Anyone else think Biden and Sunak are incentivised to take US and UK put boots on the ground over Israel-Hamas-Houthi conflicts? Tories face wipe-out, and Biden faces a close call with Trump, and nothing helps guarantee re-election like being at war.

It is not always the West, but in Iran’s case, it most definitely is the West…

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/1953_Iranian_coup_d'état

Just one universal blood type please

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Between the “pulp fiction” attributation and the nazi forehead story the other day, I think Putin has been on a QT film marathon recently.

Pretty sure this could be solved in a similar way to handling versions of a duplicate computer file, name the old EU file as EUv1, copy contents of v1 to a new EU file, make amendments to EUv2 using ctrl+f to delete mentions of Hungary (or preferably ctrl+r to change Hungary to UK, maybe rename the EUv2 file to SovereingtyUnionV1 to appease the leave voters), then everyone just leaves EUv1.

The rules mean they can’t force Hungary out, but Hungary can’t stop everyone else leaving and forming a better club.

Are you crazy?! 5-6pm is rush hour! No it must be 2-3am, but if any of your neighbours are woken up, they must spend six months in a re-education camp kindly funded by our BP sponsors.

I have only ever bought phones with a 3.5mm jack. I have expensive Sony headphones I use for music and would hate having that option taken away from me. That’s why Fairphone is still a miss for me right now.

All of my Bluetooth experiences from headphones to Alexa devices have been more of a nuisance than a convenience, often not pairing, randomly unpairing or forgetting connectivity, finding it difficult to unpair to pair another device, not finding devices literally centimetres away, draining phone battery faster, short bluetooth device lifespan, recharging requirements, sound quality, and price points all going against them. I have seen people unironically suggest adding a wire to the Bluetooth headphones so you could charge them from your phone while listening to music. Bluetooth isn’t good enough to supercede wires.

Usb C converter is not the same as plain wired connectivity, its more fragile than 3.5mm, it cannot be rotated or twisted, it is bulkier, prevents charging at the same time, and adds yet another small expensive wire to forget, lose, or break. It solves a problem no-one asked for. Anyone who doesn’t want a smashed screen has a chunky case so phone thinness doesn’t matter.

I just want all of my tech to work with each other universally. We used to have the choice of both and I think returning to this standard will make everyone happy.

Still no 3.5mm jack, still no dice for me.